You know what I'm talking about.
The second you sit down to scroll Instagram, you see a handful of girls fresh out of hot aerial yoga spin class, 3 friends who published their new web series, a handful of former acting classmates who are live streaming a table read, and roughly 25 #bts photos (behind the scenes, it's ok I didn't know that for the longest time either) of people on a set.
And here you are sitting on your ass. If you're me....probably eating something.
It is almost impossible to cut yourself a break in an industry fueled by people "going the extra mile" and "hustling" (you already know how I feel about that term).
Where does it pause? When do you get to just be for a minute?
When you book a series regular? When your movie hits the Popular column on Netflix? When your face is on a billboard and the residual checks are rolling in from a national commercial?
Guys.
We are setting ourselves up to 100% BFO: burn-fucking-out! Because guess what happens when you get those things? You are nonstop. Events, press, interviews, photos, social media, contracts, required meetings, paying insane taxes, people asking you for more than you can give, and that constant never ending realistic Hollywood feeling in the back of your mind: This can stop at any moment, gotta find the next thing asap.
BREATH.
I did not mean to stress you out here, shit I stressed myself out.
We ALL feel like we're not doing enough. There I said it.
Even the people who's IG story is littered with their #hustle. I know you screen shotted an older photo and posted it today by the way...
And I don't think there is an exact answer to what enough really is. But I do think there is a line within ourselves where we know we could or could not be doing "more". I really think you have to sit with this one (dare I say meditate) and figure out what exactly it is you think you are missing.
That DOES NOT MEAN a booking or an agent or a perfect body (and if anyone knows where I can get all 3 of these, I will sell you this website as well as my first born [dog]). This means target things like: money, free time, energy, social media presence, an extra workout, a creative outlet, etc.
For example, when I sat with this lately I realized that while I am lusting after people's bookings and success, what I am really wishing for is a creative outlet to be very publicly proud of. And some more money. That's the god's honest truth. So to work on this over time I have created this site and soon to be podcast. I have also gotten certified to be a trainer and pilates coach to make more income with something I enjoy at the same time.
Do I feel 100% fulfilled? Fuck no.
Do I feel way better a lot of the time? Shit yea.
I also have a mental checklist I run though as I wake up in the morning and fall asleep most nights. I hope this is helpful to you as well.
1. What will I/did I do for myself today?
-This used to be on the bottom of my list. It has since moved up. It could mean anything from an extra long walk with my dogs to meditating to posting a selfie I looked hot in.
2. What did I do for my family?
-This includes my boyfriend and my dogs as well as my parents, sisters, brothers, grandmas, etc. I don't necessarily involve all these people every day, but hitting a handful amounts to a great day. A really good hug counts by the way. Somedays that's all you have. And that's ok.
3. What did I do for my friends?
-Again, obviously I don't have time to give tons of time to my friends daily, but I do have time to send a text back [or FIRST!] at the very least. Again with the hug advice from above ^^^
4. What did I do for my body?
-This does not mean that if I ate fries, nachos, and beer and didn't workout that it was a "bad" day. This means I did what my body needed today, have a green smoothie, get a sweat in, or maybe I really needed that rest day and beer. (If you want to hear more on my opinions of food and exercise, this check this out)
5. What did I do for my career?
-Now here is where the other stuff comes in. Attend a class, update my reel, go to an audition, work on my sides, watch a new show (how cool is our job that this qualifies as work?? gotta appreciate) etc. I sometimes count writing for this site as a career move. Your creative outlet, as long as it in some small way, gives you a platform to make/write/post/do things, counts.
[MAYBE] 6. Did I make any money today?
-I don't love this one as it can set you up to run via numbers which is not positive to me. But it does quantify your day jobs which is nice.
That's it. If I hit all of these, god damn it is a great day! If not, better luck tomorrow. And that is what I strive for.
Maybe that doesn't seem like enough to you....well somedays it doesn't seem like enough to me either. It's not perfect. But it helps me stay in my own lane and continue my own work.
Because I sure as shit am not doing hot aerial yoga while I live stream my #bts table read.