It's my birthday and I'll do whatever I want to.

When you're 16 and you picture your 29th birthday, it looks a very certain way.

When you are 21 and you picture your 29th birthday it looks a very different way.

And when you are about to turn 29th it kind of just looks like....tomorrow.

Tomorrow marks the beginning of my 29th year on this Earth (this go around at least...wink wink) and I have to say this is not at all what I pictured.

If you would have asked me when I was a kid what I would be doing at "almost thirty" my answer would have been something about being married and having kids (and in case you missed this article, neither of those things are happening anytime soon).

If you had asked me when I first moved to LA it would have involved quite a bit more steady acting, because I really thought steady acting was a thing...it is not. My "Five Year Plan" however provided a good laugh many years later.

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I usually avoid birthday celebrations, not because I dislike the aging process (I think it's kinda fun actually) and not because I don't like attention (I mean does that even need explanation) but because I feel like I'm just not quite....there yet.

"Like I don't have a reason to celebrate" sounds very deep and depressing so let me explain. I love my life and all the things happening in it. But because my career and drive is solely based upon the "next thing" and the "next thing after that", it always feels like it's just not quite there yet, that maybe next year I will want to have a big celebration because maybe then I will be in a celebration-worthy state.

But today as I was listening to Lauren Graham (Talking as Fast as I Can, fantastic in audiobook form) talk about all the years she spent working on Gilmore Girls, the role she loved more than any other role she had ever read or preformed and that was a steady paycheck for 6 years (WHAAAA) she said she was so busy working and so busy being immersed in it, she didn't even realize what it was at the time.

I realized that feeling I'm waiting for, that moment it's ok to relax and enjoy and celebrate, is often lost among the nonstop work that comes along with it.

So.

Fuck it.

I am nowhere near a series regular or a studio-preferred lead. But I am pretty fucking talented and hard working.

And I would bet a lot of money (I do not have) that you are too if you are reading this.

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So here is what I am celebrating this year:

-Being a very happy girl in her late 20's who can still play 21 on TV (thank you sunscreen and Mom's genetics)

-I have a washer and dryer in my apartment. And a dishwasher.

-A lovely home with the best man I have ever met and two dogs who make every morning worth waking up for

-The tightest group of friends I've ever had

-My hangovers (albeit few and farther between than they used to be) are mild at best

-I workout more often than I don't and can touch my toes and all that

-A handful of solid credits, a team who works their butts off for me, 2 movies and a guest star coming out later this year

-I haven't cracked my iPhone 7 yet (check in with me after my birthday party please)

-A website that represents what and who I am that I built and maintain 100% solo

-My family and friends are happy and healthy

--Did I mention the dogs?

I could go on but now it feels a bit gratuitous...

I highly recommend you make a list, it doesn't have to be your birthday to reflect on all the great things you have going on. Don't miss the forest for the trees....or the hills for the multimillion dollar houses.